The Communication Drainage

The Communication Drainage

We all know that one of the main things within a relationship is communication. It can either make or deter the bond that you and your mate have. However, sometimes we get good communication and talking to each other every day mixed up with the other. For long distance relationships, it is crucial that the two of you talk on a daily basis in between your hectic schedules because the two of you only see other each at a months end, some times you’ll go several months without seeing each other. So that is understandable. If you are in a log distance relationship this article does not pertain to you, so you can click to the next article or continue reading if you’re an avid reader.

Now for those of us that get to see our significant other every weekend and sometimes during the week, if our weekly schedules persist us to, then we can drain our relationship when we put an expectation of talking to each other every day. However, if the relationship is new, say under 6 months, then yes you guys will talk for hours on end every night and then see each other that weekend. As the relationship progresses and becomes stronger and more serious the need to have those “puppy love” convos become not that much of a necessity because 1. the two of you already have that communication set in place where you know what each other’s work and/or classes schedules are and you communicate in advance in whatever weekend plans are coming up for the two of you, and 2. you see each other regularly.

There still may be someone, mainly a female, thinking in her head, “Um, forget that! I need to talk to my man every day, through out the day, no matter what. It keeps our relationship in good standing.” Now I’m not saying that if you talk or communicate with your significant other every day that’s too much, it’s all about HOW much in that one day. If you are over the age of 25 and in a serious relationship that is leading to marriage in the future then you already know that the two of you, mostly the man in some cases, are building up for your future together. A couple that hustles together stays together because they are helping each other grow in their careers, and in the end you will nor have to want for anything. You both can enjoy the fruits of your labor together.

Yes, sometimes it can become frustrating when the two of you are on different schedules. You work in the day, he/she works at night. You may be used to talking for an hour every day, bur if you talk for just 5 to 10 minutes during the morning or at night after the other gets off, embrace that. This also makes the anticipation for the weekend to come faster grow so that you will see your beau again. And that’s my dear is the priceless part.

Everything is all about action. When you see each other and get all that excitement built up inside because you missed each other during the week, that’s the most important part. Just because those hour long conversations during the week have diminished a little due to work schedules, that doesn’t mean the love is not there.  The love is always there. You want to miss each other every once in awhile because it makes the relationship stronger.

Embrace those spread out, random text messages and 5-10 minute calls throughout the week. Don’t drain out your relationship with trying to talk to each other on the phone 5 to 10 times a day because after awhile it will get tiring and that “I miss you” turns into ” I just talked to you 30 minutes ago”. What future are you building with that if neither of you are really working hard to provide for it?

Naomi K. Bonman is the founder and editorial director of Purposely Awakened, a digital media agency for millennial activist and change agents of color. A digital media maven at heart, Naomi is also a journalist, screenwriter and digital content creator. Originally from Southern California, Naomi received her B.A. in Mass Media Arts with a concentration in Journalism from Clark Atlanta University and her Masters of Public Administration from Keller School of Management of DeVry University.